Thursday, April 01, 2010

Writing My Prescription for Healing-Day 1

Queen-Size Me™ is the product of a long, on-going journey towards healing of my heart, soul, mind and body. You and I both know that healing truly IS a journey; it's not something that you can simply put a bandage over (although, as superwomen with never-ending responsibilities, we try to do this very thing!) and expect it to magically disappear. No, there is a process; a formula (albiet an ever-changing formula depending on the individual) that one must consciously embark upon in order to arrive at that blessed destination...that place where you see the light at the other end of the tunnel.

That light at the other end of the tunnel eludes me...it is ever-present in my view, yet I often feel as if I'm viewing it from a slow-moving passenger train going in the opposite direction! I'm sure you can imagine how frustrating this is, day-after-day. My tunnel is separation that eventually led to an un-wanted divorce. I've processed the initial surface feelings of no longer 'feeling' that romantic love for my ex-husband, but I've not fully peeled back the layers and resolved the deeper emotional issues that are lying underneath the surface; those layers that need to be healed before a new foundation can be laid upon which to build again...and build stronger. Yet, I continue to hold on to hope in the midst of my busy days, working and commuting endless hours without making my healing a priority. Today, that postponement ceases.

I have unofficially, and without disrepect to the medical industry, 'dubbed' myself 'Dr. Estéfani'. I am going to dig deep, draw on my faith and try to milk out some wisdom by writing my way to healing, one day at a time...in essence, I am 'writing' my prescription for healing, with 'writing' being the actual means to the end. There will be ups, there will be downs. I will write something to which you can relate, something that may cause you to identify an area in your OWN life that needs a little salt...a little honey...a little TLC. I will write things that may upset or anger you, where only YOU can identify 'why?' Yet in the end-as a part of this refining process-we will shine as the queenly crowns that we are and that we were created to be. Only then will we be seen AND identified as queens by kings (another post on this topic of 'kings' will come soon)...

Some of you may walk away with a career in Full-Figure Modeling/Plus Size Modeling; some may embrace a new style of music; some may discover an amazing new way towards fitness and healthy eating; some of you will have restored marriages, or can peacefully accept divorce; some of you will apply the principles here to your overall relationships with friends and family; some of you will become great friends; others will take this info for what it is and move on. Whatever your experience is with Queen-Size Me™, my hope and my prayer is that you pass the Light and wisdom on to someone else...we are truly blessed so that we can be a blessing to others...let us not take this process lightly. It is the next chapter in our 'herstory'...welcome Queens...

Love,
Estéfani

1 comment:

  1. One of my prescriptions for healing is accepting my flaws/dislikes/imperfections as my "uniqueness". Whether it's my wide hips, thick thighs, busty bosom or big bright eyes. It's my "uniqueness" that separates me from the rest.

    Confronting the "enemy" in the "inner me". I hated the way that I looked, I hated the way that I sound. AND because I hated it, I assumes everyone else did. OH BUT GOD...He traded my ashes for beauty. I learned how to accept HIS love. In doing that, I realized that no other love really mattered. Other loves are temporal or fictitious, His love is eternal and genuine. It's through HIS love for me that I learned to love myself and my imperfections. I AM UNIQUE. I AM HIS.

    ReplyDelete